Tuesday, August 22, 2006

the new year?


I am simply in denial that school starts next week. I'm not ready. There's part of me that looks forward to the dreary days and cold weather because then I don't feel the pressure to be outside enjoying the great weather and beautiful, fantastic long sun filled days. Although I love the new beginning feeling of fall that is entrenched in my being from so many years of public school, I still don't look forward to shorter days. I miss the sense of endless days and warm nights almost immediately.

There is always this resolution in me that we're not going to sit home in summer. That we'll take all the put off day trips and we'll go to museums and traipse thru state parks and we'll finally find a place to go horse back riding.

But then the end of August sneaks up on me and we've mostly hung around our neighborhood and its too late for all the day trips.

This year we went to England! I truly accomplished one resolution and got off the North American continent for the first time. I have a better sense of what foreign travel entails and I know I want to do it again.

I also had a daydream that I was going to lounge at my friends' pool club and write a few chapters of my novel. didn't even pick up a pencil, nor did we spend that much time at their pool.

I DID get a poetry anthology organized and to the printer this summer. It's not a novel but it is something I feel good about accomplishing. It will be really satisfying if people buy and enjoy the book. Because that is why you produce a book, to share it. To have other people share the delightful tactile sensations of turning the pages.

I had lists and lists of what I wantedf to accomplish around the house. The major organizing campaign I keep threatening to wage was usurped. We thankfully got Carnm's folks to sell their house and move into a nearby condo. It was HUGE job getting them motivated and packed but it is such a joy not to drive that endless drive to Shrewsbury. We also accumulated a bunch of their stuff. SOooooo my organizing campaign got kicked high on the priority list.

I have been making some strides in day to day maintenance. I hate doing it but I like a relatively not-filthy house.

I'm also tickled with the occasional glimpses into my novel. Its just a framework right now but the characters are begining to grow flesh and plump blood thru their veins. I like that. When the weather is dark and dreary and its nighttime right away, I plan to curl up in that world and describe it to you.

I want to put more effort into the cyber worlds too. I am going to learn more about the mechanics of blogs and try to get a better habit formed. I want to interact with other bloggers more.

I defiitely want to extend the reach of www.poetryinbaltimore.com but its not going to be easy until I get a webmaster. A little more time needs to be spent resolving that issue. I have a lot of event planning and shmoozing and PR to do for Octopus Dreams as well. I want it to be a good thing.

I want to design a better garden and more attractive landscaping in front of my house. I want to spend more time in creative projects like embroidery and beading and painting and making art dolls. I want Sophie to spend more time making fun stuff too.

There are so many layers to living and I want to try to live those layers consciously. By making specific choices that enrich me and my family and friends. I don't want to pursue empty tasks that don't feed my soul. I want to be one of those people who seem so cool that you just want to get to know them. I want to share more. I want to yell less. I want the arc of my life to travel meshed within my creative work and caring for the people I love. I don't know what else makes life worthwhile.

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